I was very close to killing myself last night?

My life has taken a turn for the worse. Everything bad is happening to me, I won't bore you with the details but I'm a very lonely self conscious young woman. I always thought that no matter what happened in my life, I'd always have my best friend, but we had a massive fallen out and I don't think she trusts me anymore, I don't think we'd be as close as we were, even if she does forgive me, and that makes my heart ache. I've also got myself into trouble with other people and they have threatened me, I also have a drink problem and I always crave alcohol. Last night I got drunk to drown my sorrows and decided I have had enough. I'd never thought about killing myself before until last night and I ached to do it. But then I thought of the people I would hurt, and it made me change my mind. I woke up today still wanting to kill myself, but I guess that's the cowards way out. I just don't know what to do, I can't talk to anyone, they don't understand, but I've really scared myself when I think I was so close to ending all this misery :( help please.